WEDDING SPEECHES - IDEAS FOR WHEN AND WHERE
Speeches are a necessary part to any reception. It's a time for not only the wedding party and family members to tell the bride and groom how much they love them and wish them the best, but it's also a time for the Bride and Groom to thank everyone who had a part in their lives together and on the day.
But, everyone has been to at least one wedding where the speeches have lagged on for what seems like eternity and where it seems like everyone including the uncle's cousin's brother's friend is giving a speech. Here are just a few ideas for speeches and how to make them retain their meaning for everyone - whether it's the bride and groom, parents, wedding party or guests:
1. Keep speeches to a maximum of two minutes each. The shorter, the sweeter and more impact it will have.
2. Have one set of speeches happen after each course of the dinner so that guests are listening to them while they eat -- The Bride and Groom delivering their speech during dessert.
3. Have the Bride and Groom thank everyone as soon as they reach the head table after they are introduced by the DJ and have the rest of the wedding party deliver their speeches in between dinner courses.
4. If the Bride and Groom are present during the cocktail hour and are mingling, have all speeches/toasts except for the Bride and Groom and the parents during the cocktail hour.
5. If the Bride and Groom are present during the cocktail hour, have your wedding party (except the parents, MOH, Best Man and Bride and Groom) and any other family members who would like to deliver a message to the couple have their speech pre-recorded on video and have each speech played on screen sporadically throughout the cocktail hour. Have the parents, MOH, Best Man and Bride and Groom say their speeches during dessert.
6. Have ONE PERSON (normally the Best Man) do a toast. Don't have every person conducting a speech do a toast. This takes time for everyone to get a glass, fill their glasses etc and for some guests the repetitive toasts can get tedious. You can inform your wedding party that the Best Man (or whomever you chose) will be doing the toast and that while you appreciate the gesture additional toasts are not necessary.
7. Have the two sets of parents, the MOH and the Best Man do their speeches alone. If the BMs, GMs, grandparents and/or siblings want to say something, have them go to the podium in groups (BMs together, GMs together, grandparents together, Bride and Groom' siblings together) and limit the speech of each member of those groups to 1 minute.
I always tell my clients that weddings are such a personal event that they are a complete blank slate in terms of style. Of course there are etiquette staples (ie) thanking the appropriate people, not saying your speech drunk, not mentioning past relationships or details that may humiliate anyone, etc. But there is no "rule" that says when the speeches must take place. So feel free to play!
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